Man, let me tell you about March 2022 and how I ended up checking my horoscope like a teenager.
I was in a mess, the kind of mess where you just stare at the ceiling for hours trying to figure out which end is up. It all started a few months prior, late 2021. I was sitting on this property, a total rental nightmare, right? Tenants were a headache, repairs were endless, and every time the phone rang, I knew it was going to cost me another grand. I had bought it back when I thought I was a genius investor, but now it was just dragging me down. I needed to sell it, fast, but every time I mentally pulled the trigger, some stupid fear would lock me up. I kept pushing the decision back: November, then Christmas, then January, then February…
The Deep Dive into the Starlight
February was rolling around, and I was desperate. I was talking to a buddy, just venting, and he joked, “Dude, why don’t you check your stars? Maybe the universe has better timing than you do.”

I’m a Virgo. I always scoffed at that stuff, seeing it as total nonsense, but honestly, I was out of ideas and needed any kind of guidance, no matter how stupid. So I literally opened my laptop and typed in the exact phrase I used for the title: “Virgo March 2022”.
What I found wasn’t a specific stock tip, obviously. It was all this vague, flowery stuff, talking about “pivots,” “financial shifts,” and “a major blockage finally being removed, paving the way for smooth transactions.” One particularly cheesy one said: “The planets align for bold moves in real estate; follow the paperwork closely, success awaits.”
I grabbed onto that like a life raft. March. Real estate. Paperwork. That was it. I decided right then and there I was going to list the property on March 1st. I wasn’t waiting for a sign anymore; the internet just gave me one, even if it was total garbage.
The Gritty Details of the Practice
My practice, my stupid little experiment, was simple: List it when the stars said go and see if the deal was magically blessed. I spent the last few days of February scrambling. I called the broker, told him to get the photos done, and set the price. It was chaos, but I pushed through, fueled by a ridiculous faith in some website I’d never seen before.
March 1st hit. Listed. And the first week? Silence. Not a single call. Not one. I felt like a total idiot for listening to some random prediction. The initial “blessing” was a total bust.
Then, suddenly, around March 10th. Three offers poured in on the same day. Total frenzy. We went under contract fast, accepting the middle offer, which was all cash. Okay, maybe the stars weren’t totally lying about the “bold move.” I felt a little rush, thinking maybe there was something to this.
But here’s where the “follow the paperwork closely” part became a cruel, cruel joke. The whole closing process was an absolute nightmare from start to finish:
- The initial title search flagged an ancient easement that nobody knew about, and it took days to sort out.
- The buyer’s bank kept losing documents we had already sent twice, making my broker furious.
- My attorney was on a ski trip for a week and took ages to sign one crucial form, delaying everything.
I was sitting on piles of papers, spending hours on the phone, cursing at the prediction’s promise of “smooth transactions.” The deal nearly collapsed three separate times. The only “smooth” part was my frustration level, which was sky-high.
The Final Tally and the Real Future
We finally, mercifully, closed on March 29th. I got the money, paid off the old debt, and took a huge, shuddering breath. Was it “seeing my future”? No. It felt more like desperately swimming through concrete. The whole prediction felt like total nonsense by the end, especially the paperwork part.
So, what did this whole Virgo March 2022 thing actually teach me?
It wasn’t that the stars knew the future. My bank account didn’t miraculously fill itself because of Jupiter. The whole thing was just a big, fat permission slip I gave myself.
I had the decision ready in my head for months, but I was scared. I was paralyzed. The minute some vague online horoscope told me, “Hey, March is your month, go for it,” I acted. I used that silly prediction as the kick in the pants I needed to stop delaying the inevitable hard choice. The prediction about the ‘messy blockage being removed’ wasn’t about the universe doing the work. It was about me deciding to finally end the headache. The money I got was good, but the real win was the mental peace of finally being done with that rental hole.
Sometimes, all the logic in the world doesn’t help you make a tough decision. You just need a completely irrelevant, ridiculous excuse to get started. That’s what Virgo March 2022 was for me. Just a ridiculous excuse to get my life moving again. And hey, I got it done. That’s the only future I needed to see.
