My Saturn in Virgo Career Mess
Last month sucked big time. My boss dumped three urgent projects on me while cutting my team size in half. Felt like Saturn was sitting on my chest crushing my lungs – couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think straight. That’s when I stumbled on some astrology junk about Saturn in Virgo careers. Figured I’d try those “expert tips” as a last resort.
Clearing the Desk Disaster
First morning, I looked at my desk and nearly puked. Sticky notes everywhere, half-empty coffee cups, cables chewing through paperwork like snakes. I grabbed a trash bag and went nuclear:
- Tossed every single paper that didn’t need signing right now
- Made a “crap drawer” for chargers and adapters
- Labeled folders with fat red markers – URGENT / WAITING / TRASH
Took three hours but suddenly my keyboard wasn’t buried under invoices anymore. Weirdly felt lighter when breathing.
Meeting Detox Tuesdays
Those corporate zombies kept dragging me into useless meetings. Started blocking every Tuesday as “DO NOT BOOK” on my calendar. When Susan from accounting scheduled anyway, I walked in, dropped my printed calendar on the table pointing at the blocked day, and walked out without saying squat. Felt savage. Worked like magic – now they actually ask before inviting me.
Energy Vampire Hunt
Dave from sales would camp at my desk whining about his divorce for hours. Started wearing big headphones – not even plugged in – and doing dead-eye stares at his shoes when he approached. When he opened his mouth, I’d stand up and say “Walk with me” while heading toward the bathroom. Left him talking to the toilet door twice. Guy avoids me like the plague now. Productivity up 40% easy.
The Work Binder Ritual
Bought a ugly green binder. Every Friday 4PM sharp, I scribble:
- What got torched this week (good riddance)
- What still burns (next week’s garbage fire)
- One tiny improvement I stole (copied Linda’s coffee mug labeling)
Started noticing stupid patterns – like always running out of printer paper on Wednesdays. Now I stash emergency packs on Tuesdays. Feel like a office ninja.
Breaking Point Confession
After a nightmare deadline, I stormed into my boss’s office shaking. Told him straight: “Throw one more task at me and I’ll collapse like a Walmart tent.” Shockingly, he pulled two projects back and gave me Julie as help. Guess Saturn respects loud losers more than quiet martyrs.
Hobby Bomb Shelter
Bought a junkyard guitar that sounds like cats fighting. Every night 8PM, I strum angry three-chord nonsense until my fingers hurt. Neighbors hate me. Don’t care – it makes spreadsheets less soul-crushing next morning.
Aftermath Survival Report
Two months into this circus, I’m still buried but not drowning. Saturn hasn’t magically vanished but feels more like annoying uncle than serial killer now. Biggest win? That crap drawer – found my lost wedding ring under a tangle of USB cords yesterday. Maybe the stars ain’t full of shit after all.
