Alright so here’s how I dug into September Virgo ladies lately. Started ’cause my new teammate Sarah’s birthday falls right in that September Virgo window. Watched her like a hawk for two weeks straight, notebook in hand.
Phase One: The Stalking (Professional Version)
First thing Monday morning? She rearranged the entire fucking snack drawer in the break room. Almonds lined up by expiration date, coffee pods sorted by roast level. When I joked about it, she deadass looked me in the eye and said “Chaos wastes cognitive resources.” Noted that shit down.
Phase Two: Habit Tracking
Paid attention to her little daily patterns:
- 6:58am – Punches in EXACTLY two minutes early every damn day
- 11:30am – Eats same quinoa salad while updating spreadsheets
- 3:00pm – Wipes keyboard with disinfectant wipes (even during Zoom calls)
When her computer crashed Friday afternoon? Panic flashed across her face for like half a second before she pulled out a printed fucking contingency plan. Who even does that?
The Mind Games
Tried testing her emotional range last week. Told her my goldfish died expecting sympathy. Instead got: “Betta fish live longer. Did you cycle the tank properly?” Classic Virgo – problem-solving over pity. When I mentioned relationship drama? She analyzed compatibility metrics like a damn scientist. Zero emotional fluff.
Biggest Takeaways
- Perfectionism ain’t performative – it’s baked into their damn DNA
- Gifts MUST be practical (gave her fancy chocolates – got donated. Gave her wireless charger? Actual smile)
- Their brains run like Swiss watches – romance or drama just throws sand in the gears
End of the month observation? She’s the only one whose timesheets don’t need corrections. Annoying? Hell yeah. Admirable? …Shit, yeah.
