My Virgo Love Timing Experiment – Here’s What Actually Went Down
So listen, back in early 2014 I stumbled on this Virgo monthly love guide thing. It promised “Best Times for Love Success” specifically for us Virgos in September 2014. Now, I ain’t usually super into horoscopes, but man, things were dry on the dating front. Figured, why not? Couldn’t hurt, right? I printed that chart out like my life depended on it.
First thing I did was grab my planner – yeah, the paper kind, old school – and start circling all the “high potential” dates they mentioned. We’re talking like September 5th-7th, then around the 14th, and big one supposedly from the 22nd to 26th. Highlighted those suckers in bright yellow. Made plans! I cleared my evenings. Got a haircut. Even bought a new shirt that felt kinda “me” but maybe a little more date-like. Put myself mentally on standby for Virgo magic.
Okay, here’s the real deal:
- Early Month Buzz (Sep 5th-7th): Total flop. Went to a coffee shop reading group hoping for a cute bookworm. Spilled lukewarm coffee all down the new shirt trying to seem casual leaning against a bookshelf. Biggest interaction? Barista asking if I needed napkins. Lotsa napkins.
- Mid-Month Hope (Around Sep 14th): Friend dragged me to a low-key bar. Horoscope said “open communication flows.” Tried chatting up someone friendly. Turns out “open communication” meant they passionately talked about their iguana’s digestive issues for 45 minutes. Zero romantic spark. Just learned a lot about lizard poop.
By this point, I was feeling pretty salty. This Virgo guide felt like nonsense. I was about to throw the paper in the recycling. I mean, wasted evenings, a stained shirt, and lizard tales? C’mon.
But Then…
Forget the big “high potential” window later in the month. I was done forcing it. Wasn’t even thinking about the guide on, like, September 28th. Totally off their “peak” time. Had a miserable cold, felt gross. Went to the drugstore late Sunday night sniffing like crazy, hair a mess, wearing sweatpants, just needing tissues and cold meds. Literally no effort. Zero.
Bumped carts with this guy Jake in the allergy aisle. Started laughing about both sounding like stuffy seals while grabbing the last box of extra-soft tissues. Ended up awkwardly sharing that last box while chatting nonsense about ridiculous cold symptoms for 20 minutes right there next to the cough syrup. Exchanged numbers “just in case you find a better cold cure,” laughed again. Genuine connection? Somehow, weirdly, yes.
The Aftermath
We went out after we both stopped sounding like dying frogs. That horoscope guide? It nailed literally NONE of my key moments. Not the awkward coffee shop, not the lizard lecture, and definitely not the sniffly drugstore meet-cute. The guide was like a well-meaning but utterly useless GPS. Life happened where I wasn’t looking, where I wasn’t dressed up, and definitely not during those circled “best times.” Met Jake outside the magic window, feeling awful, looking worse. The universe apparently has a serious sense of humor and loves a plot twist. Maybe the lesson was less planning? Still figuring that out.
