The Headache Start
Alright, real talk time. Another Virgo season rolls around, and suddenly all my “quirks” get louder – the overthinking, the nitpicking, the stress when things aren’t just right. Felt like my brain was stuck on a hamster wheel full of “what ifs” and “should haves.” Broke down Sunday night ’cause I spent two hours reorganizing the spice rack alphabetically and by color. Seriously? Enough was enough. Decided I wasn’t gonna let these stars tell me how to act.
Calling Myself Out
First step? Being honest. I pulled out a notebook – old school, pen scratching paper. Wrote down the stuff driving me and everyone else crazy:
- Getting Stuck in Tiny Details: Couldn’t start writing ’cause I wasted time picking the “perfect” font.
- Critiquing Everything (and Everyone): Kept pointing out tiny “flaws” in my partner’s cooking. Made dinner tense.
- The Future Worry Loop: Spent hours stressing about work stuff that hadn’t even happened yet. Wasted energy.
- Can’t Chill About Order: Felt itchy if my desk had one paperclip out of place. Needed constant neatness.
- Hard on Myself (& Others): Beating myself up over minor mistakes, getting mad when others weren’t “perfect.”
Just writing it down made it obvious. This wasn’t helpful behavior; it was exhausting.
The Actual Fight Plan
No magic spells here. Just grunt work. Here’s what I did:
- The “Good Enough” Hammer: For small tasks? Set a timer. Picking an app layout? Gave myself five minutes max, then just picked one and started. Font? Used the default and ran with it. Pushed past the urge to fiddle.
- Shutting Down the Inner Critic: Started noticing when I was about to point out something unimportant (“Your books are slightly crooked”). Took a breath, literally bit my tongue sometimes, and asked: “Is this actually needed? Or just my Virgo noise?” Mostly, I shoved the comment back down.
- Worry Container: Forced myself to schedule “worry time.” When future anxieties popped up during dinner? Jotted down: “Worry about quarterly report TONIGHT at 7:30 ONLY.” Stuck to it. At 7:30, sometimes I’d deal with it. Mostly? By then, I realized it wasn’t worth sweating anymore.
- Mess Tolerance Training: Left one drawer intentionally messy. One! Kept a single coffee cup on the desk overnight. Felt uncomfortable? Yep. But I left it. Reminded myself: the world didn’t end. Started small, built the tolerance.
Compassion Check-ins: Stopped mid-self-criticism (“Ugh, I stumbled over that sentence!”). Asked: “Would I talk to my best friend like this?” Hell no. Said: “Alright, you goofed. It happens. Move on.” Offered help instead of criticism.
How It’s Shaking Out
Honestly? It’s not perfect. Some days I backslide hard. Found myself alphabetizing podcasts yesterday. Old habits die slow.
BUT, the wins? Noticeable. Started that blog post I’d been putting off for weeks – font be damned. My partner actually smiled during dinner last night ’cause I didn’t mention the slightly overcooked veggies. Felt the urge to reorganize a colleague’s messy desk? Took a walk instead.
Biggest win? My brain feels a bit quieter. Lighter. Like I turned down the volume on that frantic Virgo radio station playing nonstop in my head. I’m figuring out how to use the good Virgo stuff – the helpfulness, the eye for detail – without letting the annoying bits run the show. It’s a practice, not perfection. And honestly? Feels pretty damn good.
