So I was digging through my old diaries this morning – yeah I keep those dumb notebooks – and found my 2015 planner. Saw this note scribbled in the corner of July’s page: “CHECK VIRGO HOROSCOPE??” Total waste of paper since I forgot what any of it meant. Made me wanna retrace my steps.
How It Went Down
First I grabbed my crappy laptop – the one with the sticky spacebar – and fired up Google. Typed “July 2015 Virgo horoscope” real slow ‘cause my coffee hadn’t kicked in yet. Got like a million pages. Clicked the first three that looked halfway decent.
One site had this glittery purple background that hurt my eyes. Scrolled past ads for psychic hotlines and finally found the Virgo bit. Said something about “career breakthroughs” and “avoid overspending.” Rolled my eyes ‘cause I was broke back then anyway.
Second site predicted “romantic surprises” for Virgos. Laughed out loud remembering my disastrous Tinder dates that month. Third one warned about “family tensions” – kinda true since I’d fought with my sis over borrowing her car.
Wrote the juiciest bits in my planner:
- Career: Expect surprises (got written up for being late twice lol)
- Love: Take risks (asked out coffee shop girl – she said no)
- Health: Drink more water (actually did that one)
Aftermath
Checked back mid-August 2015. My notes were useless. That career “surprise”? Just my boss quitting. The “romantic risk”? Got ghosted after two dates. Water thing was good though. Ended up crossing out most predictions with a big red pen. Still kept the page ‘cause the family drama part was dead accurate – mom found my hidden cigarettes that month.
Now looking back? Horoscopes are like weather forecasts – vague enough to sound right eventually. My planner’s got way more real stuff than any star-gazer’s guesswork. But hell, it’s fun to dig up old nonsense sometimes.
