So last Tuesday I’m cleaning out old hard drives when I stumble on this ancient PDF titled “Virgo Feb 2016 tips”. Total time capsule! Figured hey, why not relive that mess properly.
The Setup
First thing I did was dust off my 2016 planner – pink glitter cover, embarrassing choice. Propped it open to February right beside my chipped #1 Virgo mug. Needed actual evidence from back then, you know?
Digging into the Tips
Took out my highlighters and went ham on the PDF printout:
- Work stuff: That tip about Mercury retrograde screwing emails? Circled it blood red. Remembered sending three project specs that month… all vanished into the void. Boss thought I was slacking.
- Money crap: Section said “avoid big purchases Feb 10-17”. Cross-referenced my bank statement. Sure enough, found a $400 espresso machine charge on… you guessed it, Feb 11th. Thing leaked scalding water for three weeks.
- Relationships: Bold claim that “an Aquarius will disrupt routines”. Spotted coffee stains next to that line. Totally forgot how my Aquarius neighbor borrowed my toolbox that month and “forgot” it in his flooded garage. Rust city.
The Big Attempt
Decided to redo one tip properly: the daily gratitude journal. Found my actual entries from Feb 8-14:
- “Grateful for yoga pants stretchy enough for third burrito”
- “Bus was only 17 mins late. Small win.”
- “Forgot gratitude. Too busy googling ‘espresso machine lawsuit'”
Classic Virgo overcommitment. Lasted six days before the journal became a coaster for that leaky espresso machine.
2016 vs Now Realizations
Funny how things land:
- Back then? Felt personally attacked because Mercury dared retrograde during my presentation week
- Today? Realize I still triple-send emails during retrogrades like a conditioned lab rat. Old habits die hard
Found the February’s last page where past-me wrote “HOROSCOPES ARE BULL BUT ESPRESSO MACHINE WARRANTY IS REAL” in all caps. Still truer than any planetary advice.
So yeah. Lessons “revealed”? Mostly that Virgos will bend over backwards to organize chaos… even fabricated celestial chaos. At least we get good stories out of it.
