So I got this idea last night – why not actually test those Virgo predictions I keep writing about? Grabbed my dusty 2022 planner, flipped to that scribbly page where I tracked every weekly horoscope. My inner Virgo needed concrete data, you know?
Step 1: Digging Up the Evidence
Crawled under my desk at 9PM yesterday – literal cobwebs on the 2022 binder. Spilled cold brew on January pages trying to find Virgo notes. Found my color-coded symbols:
- Green circles for accurate predictions
- Red X’s when horoscope totally missed
- Question marks for vague “may feel tired today” nonsense
Step 2: The Ugly Spreadsheet Phase
Opened Excel around 10:30PM. Made four columns: Week Dates – Horoscope Claim – My Reality – Accuracy Rating. Started transferring chicken-scratch notes:
- “March 7-13: Career breakthrough” – reality was getting chewed out by boss Thursday
- “June 12-18: Unexpected windfall” – $5 found in laundromat machine
Tried color-coding cells – conditional formatting hated me. That damn column highlighting January weeks still sits half-purple because I rage-quit Excel around midnight.
Step 3: Brutal Truths Emerged
At 1AM crunching numbers at kitchen counter. Crunched wrong first time – calculator app still shows “52% accuracy??” Ha! Correct math showed 38% hits over 52 weeks. Breakdown hurt:
- 27 weeks dead wrong
- 19 weeks kinda-sorta possible
- 6 weeks freakishly accurate
Final Realization During Shower
Stared at moldy tile grout thinking: Why do I stress over these? Last February’s “romantic renewal” prediction happened while I had food poisoning watching Netflix alone. Horoscopes work like bad weather apps – sometimes right by accident. Probably won’t stop reading them though. Virgos gonna Virgo.
