Man, sometimes life just throws you for a loop, right? I remember this period, not too long ago, felt like everything was just… stuck. I’d been really into messing around with my tarot deck for a while, not like a full-blown pro, just for fun, trying to get a feel for things. Mostly it was cool, gave me some laughs, some head-nods. But then this one time, I pulled a card, and it really messed with me.
I was doing a simple daily pull, just one card for the vibe of the day. And there it was, staring back at me – The Star, reversed. Now, The Star upright? That’s all about hope, renewal, feeling good, right? Like things are looking up. But when I saw it upside down, it hit me different. My stomach just dropped. I knew that meant the opposite. Like, losing hope, feeling disconnected, a real blockage in my flow. And man, that’s exactly what my life felt like at that moment, even before I pulled the card.
I’d been grinding at my job, pushing hard for a promotion that just kept getting dangled in front of me, always just out of reach. Every project I touched felt like it got bogged down, approvals came slow, and good ideas just fizzled out. It was a real drain. I started feeling this constant fatigue, like my energy was just totally gone. Waking up in the morning felt like a chore, not because I hated my job, but because it felt pointless. Like, what was the point of putting in all that effort if nothing ever moved forward?
Things weren’t much better at home either. I was trying to get a creative project off the ground on the side – something I really cared about, a real passion project. I’d spend hours sketching, writing, planning, but the spark just wasn’t there. It was like I had all these ideas bubbling up, but they just couldn’t make it to the surface. It was frustrating, honestly. I’d sit there, staring at a blank page, or a half-finished drawing, feeling this heavy sense of inadequacy. That reversed Star card just screamed at me: “You’re lost, buddy. You’re completely out of touch with your inner guidance.”
Hitting Rock Bottom with a Reversed Star
It got to a point where I was just plain miserable. My friends noticed it. My partner definitely noticed it. I was short-tempered, always tired, and just not myself. I’d try to explain it away, say I was stressed, but deep down, I knew it was more than just stress. It was like I’d lost my direction, lost that sense of purpose that usually keeps me going. That feeling of things being “blocked” just intensified. I started pulling that card more often, always in reverse, almost mocking me. It made me feel like I was totally jinxed, or just completely missing something vital.
I remember one particularly rough evening. I’d just had another setback at work, a project got shelved last minute after I’d poured weeks into it. I came home, totally deflated. I sat down with my deck, almost daring it to show me The Star upright. But nope, there it was again, The Star, upside down. And in that moment, instead of feeling more despair, something shifted. I looked at it not as a curse, but as a mirror. It was reflecting exactly how I felt, but also, it was demanding I look at why. It wasn’t just showing me the problem; it was highlighting the lack of something, the lack of hope, the lack of inspiration.
Finding My Way Back
That night, I just stared at that card for ages. I didn’t reach for a book to explain it; I just thought about what it meant to me. If The Star upright was about hope and spiritual connection, then reversed, it wasn’t just no hope, it was about misplaced hope, or actively ignoring what genuinely inspires you. Maybe I was putting all my hopes into things that weren’t meant for me, or things that weren’t nourishing my true self.
So, I started small. I decided to pull back from trying to force things at work. I stopped chasing that promotion so aggressively. Instead, I focused on just doing good work for its own sake, not for an external reward. I began to carve out time, even just 15 minutes a day, for that creative project, without any pressure to finish it. Just for the sheer joy of creating. I started spending more time in nature, something I used to love and had completely dropped. Just walking, breathing, getting out of my head.
It wasn’t an overnight fix. Not at all. There were still days I felt completely adrift. But slowly, gradually, things started to shift. I noticed a tiny bit of my energy coming back. I found myself humming a tune while working on my side project, something I hadn’t done in months. Little glimmers of inspiration started to poke through. It was like I was slowly, painstakingly, righting that reversed Star card myself, piece by piece.
One day, a few months later, I pulled a card. And there it was. The Star. Upright. And man, I almost cried. It wasn’t because everything in my life was suddenly perfect – far from it. But that feeling of being completely lost, utterly hopeless, had lifted. I realized that the challenge wasn’t just to endure the reversed meaning, but to understand what it was trying to tell me. It made me dig deep, reconnect with what truly mattered, and let go of what wasn’t serving me. It was a tough lesson, but damn, I needed it.
