Man, I was absolutely drowning. Drowning in spreadsheets, drowning in meetings that could have been emails, and definitely drowning in the kind of office politics that just suck the life right out of you. It had been seven years in that same gig, steady paycheck, decent benefits, all the things you’re supposed to want. But every single morning, hitting that snooze button felt like an act of rebellion, and then finally getting up felt like dragging a five-ton weight across the floor.
I knew I was done. Totally fried. Cooked. But the fear of actually leaving was huge, man. Like, paralyzing. I’d look at job boards, and everything looked the same, just a lateral move to another beige cube farm. I didn’t want a new job; I wanted a whole new life trajectory, but I had absolutely zero idea how to make that leap. Everyone told me to network, update LinkedIn, get a professional headshot. That stuff just felt so sterile, so completely wrong for the massive life overhaul I knew I needed.
Hitting the Cosmic Strategy Session
I’ve always been into the weird stuff, astrology and tarot, not in a serious guru way, but just messing around with decks and charts for fun. This time, though, I needed a real, concrete roadmap, something that spoke to the deeper ‘me’ that the corporate world was suffocating. I didn’t just want career advice; I wanted soul advice on my career. I dragged out my old deck, shuffled them forever, and decided I was going to treat this like the most important business meeting of my life.
I didn’t do some crazy ten-card Celtic Cross or anything complex. I just needed three simple answers: What’s blocking me? What’s my true strength? What specific action do I take right now?
- The Block: I flipped the first card. Holy smokes. It was the Four of Swords. That’s pure stagnation, man. Rest, retreat, being totally withdrawn and unable to move. It wasn’t the job that was blocking me; it was me sitting there, frozen, thinking about it too much and doing nothing.
- The Strength: The second card was the Empress. That’s creation, abundance, fertility, making things grow. It told me my power wasn’t in processing or organizing; it was in building something new, nurturing an idea, and making it real, probably with my own hands or voice.
- The Action: The third card, the one I was waiting for, was the freaking Knight of Cups. Now, that guy isn’t about charging in headfirst like the Knight of Swords; he’s about following your heart, being romantic, approaching things with sensitivity and artistic vision. It was telling me to follow a passion project, to let emotion lead the way, not logic or salary figures.
Connecting the Dots to My Star Sign
Once I had those cards, I pulled my old Astrology book and looked up my sign again. I’m a Pisces, right? Total dreamer, emotional, need to feel like I’m doing something creative or serving a bigger, more compassionate purpose. That Knight of Cups, that emotional, intuitive action? It screamed Pisces. The Empress, creation and flow? Also super Pisces territory. My corporate job? Zero Pisces vibe. It was obvious the universe was telling me to stop being so logical and professional and start being me again.
The solution wasn’t finding a new office job; it was creating something out of thin air, driven by passion, something artistic and helpful. I latched onto the idea of taking my experience in project management but blending it with my passion for helping people find balance—something I’d been reading about for years.
The Jump and the Scary Reality
So I didn’t quit immediately, no one can afford that, but I started living the Knight of Cups life on the side. Every single night after work, I’d come home totally wrecked, but I’d force myself to spend two hours just building the framework for this online consulting thing I dreamed up. I started writing, just messy, ugly drafts about life changes and finding meaning. I used the Empress energy to create something from nothing. I designed my own simple website, watched a zillion YouTube tutorials on setting up an LLC, and honestly, every step felt like I was walking blindfolded off a cliff.
I posted my first video, just rambling into my phone, feeling like a complete idiot. It was a disaster, low quality, bad lighting, but it was action—the action the cards demanded. My first client? A friend of a friend who just needed to talk about finding their own exit plan. It wasn’t big money, but man, it was validation. I finally had that creative, emotional outlet I needed. That was the moment I knew the Tarot wasn’t kidding.
Why do I know all this? Because if I hadn’t sat down that night, totally desperate, and pulled those three cards and checked them against my Pisces need for flow, I’d still be in that windowless office, waiting for five o’clock. This whole life I have now, being my own boss, writing all this messy stuff down and sharing it, it wouldn’t exist. That fear of leaving the steady path was the Four of Swords trying to hold me down, but the Empress and the Knight of Cups gave me the actual playbook. I cashed out my remaining vacation time and told them I was gone. Best damn messy decision I ever made.
