So this morning I totally spilled my coffee scrolling through horoscope pages – fingers still sticky from the syrup I put in it. Gotta be honest, I’ve always kinda side-eyed astrology stuff, but lately work’s been making me feel like a hamster on a wheel. When I saw “Big career changes for Virgos coming your way June 20!” I figured why the heck not. Worst case? Waste 20 minutes. Best case? Maybe find a new way to avoid tripping over my own shoes at the office.
First things first – actually found that prediction deep in some weekly horoscope roundup. Scribbled down the “action steps” right on my to-do list notebook like it was gospel:
- Rearrange your desk for “positive energy flow” (whatever that means)
- Start saying “yes” to unexpected opportunities immediately
- Write down three career dreams before bed tonight
Honestly felt ridiculous writing that last one down. My “dreams” usually involve the printer not jamming.
The Great Desk Shuffle Disaster
Okay so desk rearrangement. Started shifting stuff around – monitors to the left, pencil holder “for creativity” near the window. Papers flew everywhere like startled pigeons. My cat thought it was playtime and knocked my lucky cactus right off. Dirt all over the keyboard. Spent 20 minutes vacuuming keys with the nozzle attachment. Positive energy my foot.
Then my boss messages – “Client meeting moved up. Can you present the quarterly report today?” Normally I’d panic and make excuses. But remembering that “say yes” advice, I just typed back “Absolutely” while chewing my nails down to nubs. Didn’t even know which version of the report I saved last.
What Actually Went Down
Ran to the conference room sweating. Projector wouldn’t connect. My laptop froze twice mid-click. But weirdly? Didn’t implode. Said “yep, classic tech hiccups” while restarting, got some laughs. Rambled through the report. Client actually smiled when I called the budget spreadsheet “our beautiful disaster.”
Post-meeting, Janet from accounting stops me. “You handled that chaos like a pro. We need someone like you for the cross-department committee next month.” Normally I’d say committees sound like teeth-pulling. But “say yes” kept echoing, so I shrugged “Sure, why not.” Felt like I’d agreed to swim with sharks.
Later at lunch, I actually wrote those three “dreams”:
- Stop stressing about emails after 6PM
- Learn enough about budgets to not glaze over in meetings
- Work from home on Fridays so I can actually do laundry
Couldn’t believe Janet’s thing kinda matched #2.
Wait…That Was the Change?
Got home exhausted. Stared at my dirt-smeared desk cactus. That prediction said “exciting work changes” – did getting voluntold for a committee count? Or just not hyperventilating during a tech meltdown? Maybe the “change” was actually me trying something stupid like horoscopes. My cat certainly judged me hard.
But hey – I didn’t die saying yes. Desk arrangement still sucks though. Pro tip? Move plants before turning monitors. At least my keyboard’s mysteriously cleaner now.
